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Monday, 02 November 2009

Currently
Nolita
By Keren Ann
La Forme Et Le Fond
see related
While I've Been Away

Dear Kodi,
I am sorry. I miss what could have been. I wish that fate would have had us in its path, but for our own sake, it did not. Sometimes, life takes a much different road that you would have chosen yourself, but that is what makes it worthwhile. Is it though? Why, when I had gained nothing, do I feel as though I have lost so much. Emotions so strong that my heart physically aches because of what did not happen. Why can't I fill the hole you've left? I search and search, but still... nothing. I leave behind me a trail of broken pieces. Eventually, there will be nothing left to me. I cannot go on with this pain any longer. Why did you leave? And why did you leaving affect me so? We were nothing. Friends at the most... But is that it? You left behind you a door wide open. It will not close until you come back and do so. Please, either close the door, or walk through again.
After three years, I am still waiting,
<3 Chelsey

Monday, 02 February 2009

:'-(

What
Do
You
Do
When
The
One
Who
Dried
Your
Tears
Was
The
One
Who
Made
You
Cry
?
Much too young, both of us.
What are you doing?
"Don't worry, it will feel good."
My mommy said-
"You won't tell your mommy!"
I'm scared.
----
No, please stop!
He didn't listen.
Please! Ow, STOP!
Hormones cloud his vision.
You're HURTING me!
Rip!
Tear!
Cry!
Lost!
Gone.
"If you tell your mommy, she will hate you."
My gift, taken from me at only four years old.
Kept silent for 14 years.
Now it's too late.
Happy Birthday Bobby.

Thursday, 29 January 2009

Currently
Then Comes the Sun
Dancing
see related
Am I Wrong To Dream?

I feel so diffident in your preasence,
Your confident playfulness drips all over me
You play with me like a little boy would play
You spiral my emotions
I sit here speechless
First, you smell my hair
I look into your dreamy eyes
Your innocence concealed by others
But blaring loud in my ears
Your weariness shows in your dark puppy eyes
Your life, your experience, your hurt
Carefully put away
I reach out to you to embrace you
To let you know that I care
More than anyone else ever could
I brush your hand
We fit perfectly as we embrace
Like two perfectly crafted puzzle pieces
If only I could kiss you without hesitation
Without any thoughts of entangled relationships
Our hearts both contain so much complexity
Our pasts are sickly warped
But the noise of the silent hours
Molds our problems into one shared friendship
It seems that to you,
It is all so superficial
It saddens me to know that I need you
From the deepest hole in my heart
You are beautiful, innocent, my dear
We long to play, frolic, and never grow up
Yet we are drawn toward the end of the sidewalk
The end of the fairytale
I long to be held
But do you really feel more?
Do you hold that capacity to feel
As deeply as I do?
No, it draws for much too much complexities
I crave your presence
So your pillow lips would linger on mine
You make me feel so giggly and bubbly inside
Perhaps I don't have to grow up
Perhaps this hope that you have given me
Can last forever
Perhaps not
I feel so happy, so passionate, so optimistic
How could you do that to me?
What an incredible aura you give off
But perhaps I interpret your flirtatious gestures
As more than what they really are
But you keep me to yourself
There is that chance that you wish for
Something in the shallow waters
But whatever my contortions
Of your feelings may be
You've allowed me to dream of love in a new way
But the fear of hurt lies
Waiting patiently in the background
I know your are but aren't strong
Confusion lurks in your soft eyes
Despite the difficulties that present themselves
I am truly happy
Trully filled with wholeness
Let's snuggle
Smile with me, tickle me,
And make me giggle.
-Chelsey

Monday, 26 January 2009

To: My Future Husband... Whoever He May Be...

Dear Boy,
I thank God every day that we have finally met. Now that we are together, I hope you will love me for me, and not hope for someone who is much thinner or prettier than I. I hope you will not compare me to girls who have brighter smiles. I pray that you will make me laugh, take care of me when I am sick, and be a trustworthy man of integrity and honour. I hope you will remember that I prefer daisies to roses, and that my favorite color changes with my mood. Please know that my eyes are not blue, they are green with sapphire speckles and foamy blue flecks. Please know that I might be too shy to kiss you first, but please do not be too afraid to kiss me. I will not slap you or push you away. I am sure you kisses will be perfect. When we go on dates, please do not stress about where to take me; what is important is that I am with you. Please do not think that I am asking to much of you. I am very nervous and scared, but I will try my very best to be kind and love you for all that you are, without expecting too much from you. Thank you for being who you are.
Forever Yours,
<3 Girl

Sunday, 18 January 2009

Currently
Undiscovered
By James Morrison
Pieces Don't Fit Anymore
see related
Not!

I'm sorry I have a life. I'm sorry I am involved in things that make me happy. Does it matter to you not what I think. I'm sorry I study too much and don't skip my college class to hang out with you. I'm sorry I can't call you after 9 because my body needs rest for a test the next day. I'm sorry I love to minister to people and express myself in Fine Arts. I'm sorry I study for the ACT instead of go to the movies with you. I'm sorry I plan time for my music lesson instead of two hours to drive around and waste gas. I'm sorry I'm ambitious and don't want to stay at home and do nothing. I'm sorry I have two jobs to help support my family because the economy is in a state of suckiness. I'm sorry I sing and annoy you. I'm sorry I don't listen to K-Love, but instead I listen to Kings of Leon, Muse, or Jonny Lang. I'm sorry I want to play the piano for hours while I am at your house. And I'm sorry it's the same song, your song. I'm sorry that I dyed my hair brown and cut it short when you said you liked it better long and blonde. I'm sorry that I skipped hanging out at the pool hall to babysit and make an extra 20 bucks for next weeks gas. I'm sorry I had to work on BETA all day saturday instead of watch a movie at your house. I'm sorry I had to go looking for a dress for my talent competition. I'm sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry...
-
Chelsey